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The danger of pornography use isn't about
right and wrong. It’s about the effects that pornography has on the user and
the effects it has on the loved ones of the user. Pornography use has serious,
negative side effects.
Some of pornography's toxic side effects
include:
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1. Creates emotional bond with artificial
world
All people have a
critical need for human intimacy and emotional connection with others. When
someone views pornography, they end up creating an
intimate bond with an artificial, fake world and can actually lose
the ability to bond with real people.
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2. Sex without intimacy
Pornography is about
sex being used for the wrong reasons. Because it is sex without emotional
closeness, the underlying hunger remains unsatisfied. The viewer starts
wondering what is wrong with their relationships and gets irritated or
depressed. They end up feeling emotionally empty and disconnected from those
around them.
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3. Unsatisfying
While pornography use
may result in a short term high, it eventually results in feelings of
emptiness, low self-esteem and deep loneliness. It ultimately creates emotional
distance in relationships. Because the world of pornography is artificial and
cannot satisfy the need for emotional intimacy, this basic need remains unmet, creating an appetite for more
and more.
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4. Triggers addiction cycle in brain
Studies show that
actual brain function changes in someone who has an addiction – and the changes
are the same in all addiction: alcohol, drugs, or pornography. Because
pornography use can become an actual addiction, viewers are not able to stop
through their own will power. Pornography addicts will need to engage in the
same difficult recovery process a drug addict has to go through.
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5. Un-fulfilling
Using pornography to
feel pleasure and escape feelings of low self-esteem, anxiety, boredom and
frustration creates a gateway for addiction. When the rush of pleasure
disappears, the feelings a user is trying to escape from reappear stronger than
ever, and they are compelled to repeat the cycle. Over time, their brain
chemistry is altered and a full-fledged addiction occurs.
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6. Great deception
Initially, you were
attracted to pornography because of the positive things it did for you.
("I love the rush I feel," "This is my favorite pastime,"
"I feel lonely," "This is my reward to myself for making it
through a rough day...") Eventually, it will do just the opposite.
("I no longer feel an emotional response to anything," "There is
nothing in my life I enjoy doing," "I feel totally isolated from the
world," "My anxiety and stress levels are at an all-time
high...").
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7. Imitation of the real thing
With pornography, we
use sex as a substitute for nurture, intimacy, and love. Sex is no longer a
wonderful source of connection between our deepest selves and a beloved
partner; it becomes a commodity used to avoid intimacy and mask needs that
should be met through human connections.
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8. Always hungry
Because this is an
addictive substance, it creates an appetite for itself. This appetite increases
over time as you spend more and more time viewing pornography. The time spent
viewing pornography can jeopardize work, relationships and interest in healthy
pastimes.
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9. Escalation
Over time, the
pornography we first started viewing becomes mundane. We escalate to view
things which we once would have considered as going too far or totally wrong.
We feel increasing desire to do things which will damage our reputation and
relationships.
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10. Blunt truth
In the long run,
pornography will not shore up a shaky ego, will not fill the emptiness left
from childhood wounds or abandonment, will not save a shaky relationship or
failing marriage and is not satisfying. In fact, it will magnify each emotional
wound from the past and cripple your ability to meet your essential emotional
needs, damage your ability to have a healthy relationship and leave you unable
to sexually or emotionally respond to your partner.
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